Just for the record, I don't know how teachers get anything done after lunch.  I remember classes after lunch and how pointless they were.  Unless it was art or gym or choir (which were always in the morning, for some reason), there was just no point of sitting through those classes.  I was tired, and restless, and just wanted to go home and rest and read a good book.  And then, of course, it was time for homework (which definitely didn't include reading good books).  And you know, that didn't change when I was a teacher.  I wanted to go home after lunch then too.  Some days, it was all I could do to muster up the motivation to teach or talk or encourage or stand up and walk around or anything after 12:30 or 1 (and this became even worse during pregnancy.  I was incredibly thankful my kids went out for recess with an aid right after lunch--I literally collapsed on my desk.).  Awful, isn't it?  What a lousy teacher!!  No, honestly, I think I was a pretty good teacher, but if I could have taken a two-hour siesta after lunch, I would have, then come back at 3 and finished the day.  Did you hear/read Elliot Spitzer's state of the state address in the beginning of January?  Did you hear that he's working on longer school days and school years for New York State's public school students?  Did you read that he thinks our kids aren't in school long enough already to get everything done they need to do?  This bugs me.  And I don't even send my kids to school yet.  And I do realize that in a lot of classrooms, there are clear hinderances to getting everything done in a day, but I blame a portion of that on the fact that many parents aren't teaching their kids to be good citizens--teachers can't teach because they have huge attitude problems/behavior issues in their classes--or because there are students in the classrooms who need more help than their teachers can possibly give them in that classroom...So of course we're not getting enough done in a day to keep up with worldwide educational standards.  SO, we're going to make kids go to school for, say, 8 hours a day instead of 6, and then we're going to make them go to year-round school, with 3 or 4 three-week breaks (when we only actually have 2 months a year that are decent enough weather to consistently play outside), and we will eliminate our childrens' summer vacation and the only time in a year they can play like children are supposed to play (assuming they actually play rather than sitting in front of the TV or video games).  Will I send my children to public schools when they decide to keep them in school for longer in a day than they're home?  Will I send my children to public schools knowing they can't accomplish in a 6-hour day half of what I can finish in a 3- or 4-hour day at home, and that my children love it here and are thriving?  Though I realize that I only have 3 children, and a typical classroom has 25 or so, mine are at two different grade levels, and we still get done what we need to get done!

Oh, I'm pretty sure they'll go to public school some day.  It will just take a lot of time spent convincing myself they actually need the education provided in the public school system.

You know, honestly, I don't know that this is all how I really feel deep down, but right now I'm working through a stream-of-consciousness type of writing streak...and you're the unfortunate reader.  That's what you get for checking my blog today.  Should have given you a warning at the beginning of this blog--I said I was going to do that, didn't I?  OK...just changed the title...fair warning now given. 

Oh, you brave, brave friends...

If you allow your children to choose their bednight snack (or before-bed snack for those of you who may not speak Frazer), they will choose garbage.  If you take them to Wal-Mart at 7:15 at night, telling them that if they do a good job and we can make it through the store in ten minutes, they can have whatever they want for a snack, they will practically run to the Little Debbie snack aisle, and head right for the worst, junkiest, most-sugar-laden, preservative-filled snack they can find and that will be their bednight snack.  Right before bed, they need sugar and things like red dye, don't they?  As long as we help brush their teeth and tell them that if they play around, there will be consequences, this is justifiable, right? 

The next time I get on my kids' cases for not going to bed well, remind me of this little precedent I've set.  Remind me it's not necessarily Reasa's fault she can't stay in bed and winds up downstairs three times before we threaten her life.  I allowed her to get the creme-filled chocolate chip cookies and eat them at quarter to 8.  Lainie is not just plain naughty.  She ate two double chocolate cookie rolls twenty minutes before she was pounding her heels against the wall in her room in complete silliness.  Bryson isn't just monstrously out-of-control as he pretends to be Buzz Lightyear flying into his pillow from the end of his bed.  I gave him a 2-pack of frosted fudge brownies 15 minutes before I laid him down.

Mommy.  That's my name.  I have minor brain damage and a guilty conscience (I ate a cream-filled chocolate chip cookie and a scoop of mint chocolate chip ice cream after they went to bed.).  Well...they won't forget their childhood, will they? 

I sure won't.

I had six children in my house yesterday.  From 9:30 until 3:30, I had six children.  From 7:45 until 5:30, I had 5.  At 2:30, the one who had been sleeping since 1 woke up just in time for the baby to take her place in the pack and play.  At 3:45, after putting the awake child in her mother's arms, 5 children in my house were sleeping.  All at the same time.  The oldest, 7, desperately needed a nap, as did the 6-year-old, and the 9-month-old.  The two four-year-olds need a nap every day, but that day, not with the same desperation as the other three.  I sat on my couch (after washing the dishes, folding and changing over a load of laundry, rescuing the house from the pollys, barbies, and baby toys strewn near and far, and checking my email), and crocheted two rounds on a purple afghan for my sister-in-law's coming baby.  In silence.  And calm.  Everyone awoke peacefully and happily, everyone ate almost all of their lunch before that with silly chatter and giggling at the table, the oldest four got all their schoolwork done, the baby took more from a bottle for me than his mother expected, even the sixth went potty each time she was asked, and only had one wet diaper all day (she just started potty training).  

No, not every day with six children is this beautiful.  I don't pretend to think that.  Tomorrow with five will be interesting, I'm sure.  They'll all feel more tired than they were on Wednesday, the novelty of spending a whole day together will have worn off, and tomorrow, the oldest two don't take naps, just rest.  The baby might decide that bottle of milk just isn't quite good enough, and the four-year-olds might take turns fighting over the dog.  Who knows.  But honestly, it doesn't matter.  THIS is what I was meant to do.  THIS is it.  Not babysitting, necessarily.  I'm not cut out for babysitting full-time all the time, and I know that.  But lots of kids...this is what I was meant to do.  Period.

Yes, I have just three.  But in my heart, there will always be room for a couple more.  And the three I have...they will have my heart.

...how disastrous home improvement projects make your home before they actually improve them.

...how long it takes to potty train a strong-willed puppy.

...how long it takes to potty train a strong-willed child.

...how much dust accumulates on the top of my refrigerator in a given month.

...how easy it is to avoid the dust on the top of your refrigerator.

...how often a child's under-the-bed space resembles the bottom of the the car.

...how many times you have to scrub a toilet in a household of 5 in a week.

...how many times you have to go over your dog's favorite place to sleep with the vacuum in order to return your carpet to its original navy blue.

...how often a bunny's litter box needs to be changed.

...how much maintenance pets require (holy heck!).

...how much dust settles after sanding off joint compound.

...how much dust resettles after you dust after sanding off joint compound.

...how long it takes a home improvement project to get completed.

...how many times in a day children need more food.

...how often you have to wash dishes by hand when the dishwasher gets broken.

...how often your kids will ask to help with the dishes if you let them help you once.

...how much longer it takes to do dishes when your kids help you.

...how much fun it is to be covered in bubbles and water when your kids help you with the dishes.

...how many times you have to snuggle your kid in a day to remind them how much you love them.

...how many times you should snuggle your kid after you scold them for doing something they knew they shouldn't have done.

...how much more fun it is to snuggle a kid than it is to do dishes.

...how incredible it feels when someone tells you you're pretty.  And means it.

...how easy it is to tell your kids how pretty they are.  And mean it.

...how quickly paper clutter accumulates on top of your printer.

...how long it takes to notice that paper has cluttered your printer.  

...how quickly paper gets jammed in your printer when paper has cluttered your printer.

...how long it takes to unclutter your printer when the printer gets jammed because its top got cluttered.

...how much clutter accumulates everywhere in your house, and how long it takes to deal with any of it.

...how many skeins of yarn a baby afghan requires.  

...how long it actually takes to use all those skeins of yarn to make that baby afghan.

...how great you feel when you learn that the baby you made the afghan for won't sleep without it.

...how easy it is to forget how important little things really are.

I consider myself a content person. In general, I am thrilled with my life. I love my children, my house, my car, my dogs...my camera. Yeah. My camera. Remember that blog about the dog versus the camera thing?? Well, my husband decided the day before Christmas that it was stupid that I had to make the choice between a dog and something I really needed (because, you know, I really needed an 8 megapixel Canon Rebel XT. Right.), and he ordered me a used one from a reputed company. It came down to him being sick of the 40 rolls of film sitting in our living room waiting to be processed (still waiting...)(and eventually needing to be processed despite the fact that I have the digital now), plus, I think, a tiny bit of "if-I-buy-her-the-camera-she's- dying-to-have-I-can-justify-getting-the-gun-I've-been-dying-to-have-and-she-can't-say-anything" added in there. He has a good heart. I almost killed him. OK, that's a bit strong. I got really angry and cried, and when it came on Thursday, I thanked him. It IS an awesome camera, after all. And it takes fantastic pictures.

So anyway, contentment. The Proverb's 31 devotional in my inbox on Tuesday had to do with contentment. The writer talked about the fact that contentment means wanting what you have. How many times a day am I happy with exactly what I have and not looking ahead to when I can have something else? Honestly, I generally find myself very happy with what I have. My kids bring me joy every day. They have tough moments, but overall, I would not wish for anything different, even considering those moments. I could not ask for more from my house space-wise or suitability-wise. Yes, it could use updating here and there, but I don't care about it...we function so well here. God put us in this house, without a question. I love my car. It is sporty and spacious and in great shape. I didn't ever plan to own an SUV-type vehicle, just because I figured I would drive a minivan for the rest of my life, which wouldn't bother me either. But I love my car. With more than 100,000 miles on it, the transmission was bound to have issues. In two weeks, we will get it fixed. That's when the budget allows for it. My gracious parents let me use their 2nd vehicle to get to our weekly gymnastics classes, and we're fine. I don't care that we typically have to budget every penny, right down to one meal out at Denny's kids eat free night, and that lately, especially with Christmas and buying without credit cards, at the end of the two-weeks between pay checks, we're really hoping we don't have car trouble. The thing is, I know we're blessed. More blessed than we can possibly understand. By middle class standards, we are somewhere above poverty-stricken...but by the standards of the rest of the world...we just can't even understand. And I know this. And this makes me grateful. I love my life. I know that I could easily and happily live with less.

How do two married people have such completely differing views on what is enough?

Would I want to give up my high-speed internet or my digital cable or Netflix or my cell phone to make a little more room in my budget? No. I wouldn't want to, necessarily. Would I do it if I felt we needed to or if Seth asked me to do it? Yes. Without a second thought. I would not bat an eye. Do I live a life filled with extras? Well, by America's standards, no. But let's put ourselves in Haiti for a moment, and I choose Haiti because we pray for a little girl from Haiti every day named Matha. My parents send Matha $30 a month, and this pays for a good portion of her school, food and clothing for a month. We spend three times that every month on our cell phone bill alone. Let's think about what her life is like every day just for a second...

Are you thinking about her life like we think about her life?

I cringe when I think about the importance we place on tv and internet and cell phones and cameras and houses and vehicles and so on. How dare I NOT be content? How dare I not sacrifice some of that to make someone else's life well-fed and well-clothed and well-educated?

Well, as my friend also wrote in her blog entry tonight, I'm going to climb down off my soapbox now...I just needed to write what was going through my mind tonight. Not that you needed to read my mind...sheesh...my poor friends. I'm sorry, all of you. Really. Rambling and preaching all in one blog entry. Maybe you could have done without that. I guess I think things through and remind myself of what is important when I write. Next time I'll warn you when I'm going to go on and on.

Blessings, all of you.